I´ll be heading to potsdam, I think. yesterday I was at the Judishces museum and it was kind of just disturbing. plus it was cloudy and rainy, appropriately. it´s so horrid.......just all of that.....the past. you can´t really escape it here. so france and germany are against the iraq war.....is it hard to understand why? If you´ve been in a place where innocent people and children are killed and lives are destroyed then of course you know what it´s like and don´t want to see it. there´s hiroshima for peace too or something like that.
I´m having kind of a crisis. maybe it will change but......I know I should have made my stay here longer and if I had to do it over again I would have bought a one way ticket or stayed through thanksgiving but here I am and I have to deal with it. I keep reading these travel blogs that kind of go like, and this november I´m in Lima.....or people whose family tells them, have fun, see you in 8 months, or even support their travels.....or people who don´t appear to be afraid or lonely or confused or people who have planned and organized every cent every minute for the next 10 months......I admire that and am happy for them, but that´s not me. my family is very conservative and home and work oriented and so is the society I live in and I can go away but at some point I have to deal with them again. these are people who say, if you´re not a junior by this age you´ve failed, or who always have the right coat for this month of this year. so it would be nice to have some company, of people who are in situations like mine. i don´t have four more years to wait for a new president (like that´s going to matter anyhow, by then) or to save $10,000 more or"find myself" so the question is, well, what now?